you see I have a feeling that if you sit any basic ape down in front of a computer and you give them great little apps like Grammarly and Fiver, wix and Instagram …. and you get , well pretty much what we have ! the age of Donald Trump ! the age of the charlatan ...of utter shameless phoney-ism …. well marketed ! well presented , well branded , prospectus ready propaganda for individuals with zero calibre , but (usually)an inherited means of suitably outsourcing their inadequacies to more proficient but less ' entitled ' individuals !
jeeez where am I going with this ??!!
o.k my original point I was trying to make was about a book and a series of original illustrations that are being prepared for launch !
which got me thinking about how as I travel around I have to interact with a great deal of assumptive functionality of administrations ! I am often flustered with missing luggage/ product on the way to or on the way back from some self destructive desire to exercise the full extent of my social anxieties … to some audience of complete strangers ! and there are more times than I can recount that I have found myself in a furious dispute with some halfwit that has sited themselves in some un firable position that often spout the familiar notion '' oh its quite simple ….''
oh dear god no you little app interned asshole … it clearly isn't … as I stand here with an unpredictable amount of credit on a dodgy rural line trying to hold a tarpaulins over £10,000 worth of stock to prevent the rain storm that is currently soaking me to the skin into a simultaneous waste of 6 months work and a difficult to explain insurance claim !
all I have to do is log on and amend the admin element you clearly fucked in the first place !!
and after a full days worth of ' travelling ' in this peculiar manner ….. when the hour is small and the morale at its absolute lowest ….. if there is the combination of just enough assumed time … enough laptop battery and / or wifi … and access to coffee and /or whiskey ...ideally both and all of the above ! I will sit on the brink of a shattered shell of myself in the weirdly comforting glow of the computer light ..sip a coffee , smoke a cigarette … and just smash a few words into this digital substitute for a sketchbook !
its a weird thing , both that I feel compelled to write it … and also that it seems people are willing to read it … this mad word salad , hunter s Thompson work method inspired way of thinking in type during times of despair and or exhaustion !!…
and this is where we come back around to the title ….
I remember watching an episode of ' the young Indiana jones chronicles ' from ' the war years ' and the character is just trying to get a telephone installed in his new apartment in brussels
all manner of bureaucratic nonsense and subsequent hilarity ensue … its a bit tongue in cheek , but well worth a watch if you have ever found yourself on end of a phone line to an expert who is versed in everything but the relative nature of your circumstance ….
Brexit - Tereasa May and the whole damn administration block of this utter age of the charlatan !! all armed with Grammarly and a sense of self importance …..
with this whole looming uncertain Brexit fiasco going on , since before Christmas I have been casually perusing my options for what ' alternative gainful employment ' this particular economy might offer …..
and its utterly deplorable !! I sent of an expression of interest to a local based position through some third party agency … the position was advertised as '' SPATIAL ALLOCATIONS ADMINISTRATOR '' …. basically a shop display designer … or at least that was the closest translation I could muster …..
I was contacted by a '' TALENT AQUISITIONS SPECIALIST '' …..asking for further elaboration on my cover letter …. I suggested she buy a copy of my book !!
jeeezus wept !!! who the fuck are these people …
these undefinable administrative positions , for huge ambiguous organizations be they government or corporate …. and why don't they speak English !
I had a similar problem while just trying to log in to peruse the available positions on Plymouth Universities Website …. effectively finding myself locked out of the admin procedure because they have no hard/ physical copy option for application
I wrote about a laugh I had before Christmas at royal mails '' H.R '' theme park
Now I cant imagine what kind of straight lace -white bread - bbc breakfast- gcse A grade kind of middle class kids it is you are filling the administrations of this country with … but please fucking stop it !! we need revolutionaries , not high performers in a system that has been systematically fucked for 40 years ! the old and scary adage … '' what one generation tolerates , the next generation accepts as normal '' … well I think that we are now so ingrained into a kind of Thatcherist brain washed / property price / interned assholery that this might be fucked beyond all scope of salvage !
I was looking at a job vacancy at the local museum ( they just spent millions on it … huge housing crisis in the city but whatever ! ) '' Events Coordinator '' or something … and that's a job I could do exceptionally well … however the strategic element of this position was to ensure the long term financial viability of various ' projects and events ' through collaborative measures ….they have taken a job ideal for a creative .. and turned into something applicable to an estate agents c.v ??
the same with positions available at '' the Plymouth School for Creative Arts '' …. now am I misunderstanding this ! / but isn't the whole enterprise part of the utter failure of the tory run out of privatisation and academisation of the school structures ??
you see I should really be in a position where I am considering these positions … even vying for these positions , but they have all been tinged with a hideousness , that makes even a respectable salary … un appealing !!
its a terrible thing when instead of continueing to constructively attempt to engage with the processes at hand , after over a decade of ineptitude , greed , and utter arrogance I would rather go and be a peasant avocado famer in some remote region of the world x …..
my little sketchbook thought for the ' Plymouth After Dark ' .GOV initiative x
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